Perfectionism
Speaker on the radio talking about her raging perfectionism got me thinking. Are we really perfectionists? No, we suffer from limited vision. We are only perfectionists about what we see, can control. If we were really perfectionists (and I'm not sure I fit that category anyway--my house doesn't reflect it, nor my office, nor my looks), we couldn't live in the world; we would have to be medicated or blindfolded or never be able to listen to the news or hear prayer requests. The world is so broken, so in disarray (yet still so fascinating and wonderful, I have to add, still marked with the beauty of the original creation) that if we were perfectionists we would explode in an hour or less in trying to set it right.
I think what people call perfectionism is a mixture of control, pride, limited vision, legalism, fear, and lack of faith. I think calling it perfectionism gives it dignity it doesn't deserve. In regard to the first sentence in this paragraph, I am guilty of perfectionism, because I am guilty of all those behaviors.
The visiting professor I mentioned in the post "Adult Education and Spiritual Transformation" used a term I like: "psychic pampers." The idea is that we try to cover ourselves with masks or clothes or other things that supposedly cover what's really inside but it all comes squishing out anyway (like a baby severely needing a diaper change!) One student said that sounded like the name of a band! So what I might want to call perfectionism is probably not seen as that by others and is probably seen more as what it is. In the case of a colleague, I could describe him/her as perfectionistic, but what I really see is a deep-seated, tragic anger, the source of which I have a suspicion about but would never state publicly.
So let's stop looking at our perfectionism and start looking at the perfect one, the one who can look at the world fully and not have his head explode, the one who has all power when we have so little, despite our rhetoric and claims to the contrary.
I think what people call perfectionism is a mixture of control, pride, limited vision, legalism, fear, and lack of faith. I think calling it perfectionism gives it dignity it doesn't deserve. In regard to the first sentence in this paragraph, I am guilty of perfectionism, because I am guilty of all those behaviors.
The visiting professor I mentioned in the post "Adult Education and Spiritual Transformation" used a term I like: "psychic pampers." The idea is that we try to cover ourselves with masks or clothes or other things that supposedly cover what's really inside but it all comes squishing out anyway (like a baby severely needing a diaper change!) One student said that sounded like the name of a band! So what I might want to call perfectionism is probably not seen as that by others and is probably seen more as what it is. In the case of a colleague, I could describe him/her as perfectionistic, but what I really see is a deep-seated, tragic anger, the source of which I have a suspicion about but would never state publicly.
So let's stop looking at our perfectionism and start looking at the perfect one, the one who can look at the world fully and not have his head explode, the one who has all power when we have so little, despite our rhetoric and claims to the contrary.
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