Girls and Being Noticed

-

“I waited to be told what was good about me . . . All that time I had spent readying myself, the articles that taught me life was really just a waiting room until someone noticed you—the boys had spent that time becoming themselves.” (from Alyssa Wilkinson’s article in CT, quoting Emma Cline in THE GIRLS
Maybe not that simple.  Guys are not Neantherdals with no empathy or self-awareness.  For every Brock Turner there are 100 “good guys” who would pull Brock Turner off the unconscious victim.  I raised one and I have plenty of friends with “good guys” for sons.  And there is plenty of research to show that while girls have been able to flourish in the education system, guys are left behind.  
But the truth remains that even today girls seem wired to “wait to be noticed” and even worse to gauge their worth on being noticed.  I see it in myself.  Let no one despise your woman-ness.  Not your femininity, which has been conflated with domesticity (although essential housekeeping skills should be part of one’s upbringing) or consumerism (feather pens and 100 pairs of name brand shoes in a huge closet) or moodiness.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Kallman's Syndrome: The Secret Best Kept

-
I went to my cardiologist yesterday.   Every year I have to wear a Holter monitor for a day because of a heart ablation I had in 2007.   If you don’t know what a Holter monitor is, it’s a 24-hour mobile, wires-hanging-off-your-body EKG.   The nurse practitioner saw me, (not the doctor, which is ok because his voice puts me to sleep).   She was very sweet.   She asked me if I was still taking Estradiol and Progesterin.   “No,” I said. “I’ve totally gone off those.   I was on them for a very long time and I wanted to be sure to stop.” What I didn’t tell her is how long I actually had taken those hormones.   37 years.   I started with HRT when I was 17 because I have Kallman’s Syndrome.   You may never meet a person who has this condition.   It only affects 1 in 10,000 people (or 1 in 86,000, according to one source) so that’s quite a range and far more males have it than females (as do most negative things).   So, being female, I am quite an oddit
Read more

Annie Dillard on Writing Advice and Some Observations

-
  https://getpocket.com/explore/item/write-as-if-you-were-dying-read-annie-dillard-s-greatest-writing-advice?utm_source=pocket-newtab-en-us I frequently listen to a podcast called THE HABIT. Its host is Jonathan Rogers, who for the most part interviews writers with a Christian focus. He is a better interviewer than I, and he runs a community of writers. I recommend him. I do have to say that the podcast makes me feel very shallow as a writer.  One reason is that Jonathan Rogers has a signature question, Who are the writers that make you want to write? If I ever land on his program (a dream), I will need an answer to that one, and right now I don't have one. Sure, there are writers I like, lots of them, but reading them doesn't send me to my computer to get cracking. They are more likely to make me think, you've got no business doing this writing gig.  Actually, bad or mediocre writers motivate me more although I am not exactly proud of that. And the fact that what I want to
Read more