Wednesday, October 12, 2011

World's Worst Movie(s)

I am trying to make titles on these posts that will get attention.  That one probably should.

Now, I generally try to watch the best movies, not the worst.  But sometimes you end up watching a stinker so bad you just have to write about it.  I don't have a "bottom ten," just a few.  Now, it has to be understood that a movie is a worst movie if it was supposed to be a serious one.  Not some trash a film student made, but something played in theaters and advertised to the public.  A feature film we are supposed to pay money to see!

Plan Nine from Outer Space sinks to the bottom.  It is wonderfully bad, everything about it, that Hollywood made a movie about how bad it was.  Ed Wood shows the director as so sincere and misguided; that is my favorite Johnny Depp performance.

Johnny Guitar.  This was on TCM last night, but I couldn't bear to watch it; I had done so before, and once is more than enough.  There is no way to describe this movie.  Mercedes McCambridge is, for no other word, a dike (sorry) wearing black and bossing men around, and Joan Crawford wears a white dress and pretends to play the piano.  The accents are awful, and all over the place.  An actor starts a line with a Southern accent and ends it with an Irish.  And Ernest Borgnine is in it--a cowboy with a Bronx accent!  (He's usually very good, but this choice was insane).  Sterling Hayden looks like he wants to laugh--or go to sleep--throughout the whole thing.   In one scene, he and Joan Crawford are supposed to be in a carriage and the scenery passing behind them is washed out, like it was superimposed on a much older movie.  The odd thing is that it was directed by Nicholas Ray, who did one of my favorite movies, In a Lonely Place.

Can anyone add to this list?

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