Sunday, May 24, 2015

A Non-fairytale look at marriage

Riding home from church I usually listen to TTBOOK, an NPR program from Wisconsin that goes by the name "To the Best of Our Knowledge."  They often have interesting book reviews and thoughts.  Today, not so much, so I turned over to the Christian station and heard this song.  It struck me as apoignant, truthful, realistic, and rather rueful look at marriage.

What do you think about when you look at me
I know were not the fairytale you dreamed we'd be
You wore the veil, you walked the aisle, you took my hand
And we dove into a mystery.

How I wish we could go back to simpler times
Before all our scars and all our secrets were in the light
Now on this hallowed ground, we've drawn the battle lines
Will we make it through the night.

It's going to take much more than promises this time
Only God can change our minds
Maybe you and I were never meant to be complete
Could we just be broken together.

If you can bring your shattered dreams and I'll bring mine
Could healing still be spoken and save us
The only way we'll last forever is broken together

How it must have been so lonely by my side
We were building kingdoms and chasing dreams and left love behind
I'm praying God will help our broken hearts align
And we won't give up the fight.

The lyrics are by Mark Hall and Bernie Herms of Casting Crowns. Casting Crowns is affiliated with a church in McDonough, GA, where the annual BCM conference is held, so I've been there three times.  I believe this capture the wonder and pain of marriage, especially the line, "We dove into a mystery."

In a way that we can't explain and can't live up to, the Christian view of marriage is a spiritual mystery and symbol and that's why we seem close-minded to others about it.   Two wrongs do not make a right--in both senses of "right."  

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